Confessions of a working toddler mommy

Being a mommy is a tough gig. I do not have it together. I’m not even sure what “it” is. I have succumbed to the fact that I will never be on time for anything anywhere ever again. I cannot have nice things. Let’s face it, if it’s not from Target or Ikea, we’re not buying it. Also, if you have ever seen the inside of my garage, please pretend you haven’t. Here are my top 10 confessions…
1. “Watch out for poop” is something I say on a daily basis, and I am not always referring to the dogs.
2. Oftentimes there are more snacks on the floor of my car than there are in my pantry. Sometimes my kids find said snacks days or weeks later and want to eat them. I do not stop them.
3. Sometimes I feed my kids. With a spoon. As if they were babies. Sometimes this is because I want to prevent a giant mess and sometimes it’s just because I want them to eat for goodness’ sake.
4. There is dog hair everywhere in my house. On everything. All of the time. I find it in the refrigerator and in my 2-year-old’s diaper. I’m not sure how this is possible.
5. I love sleep. I love sleep more than working out. Sometimes I love it more than a shower… Which brings me to #6…
6. Dry shampoo. Dry shampoo is a gift from God. I could not survive without dry shampoo. It saves my butt a few times a week.
7. Sometimes my kids eat frozen mini pancakes for dinner. On the couch. In front of the television. Don’t judge me- I defrost them first.
8. I’ve become a master at “hiding the trash,” which means my closets and drawers consist of bags of things to be given away and piles of things that need to be filed. Bags and piles. These are my only organizational skills.
9. Sometimes my dinner consists of half eaten chicken nuggets and macaroni and cheese that my children have deemed unworthy for their sophisticated palates. Meanwhile…I watched my 3-year-old pick his nose this morning and eat it.
10. I have been known to rinse the dishes in my sink so they can stay there for a couple more days without becoming too disgusting because I am too lazy to empty the dishwasher that is full of clean dishes.
Bonus confession: I schedule sex with my husband. On the calendar. Because, let’s be honest, there are seasons when it just would not happen otherwise. Sorry I’m not sorry.

6 thoughts on “Confessions of a working toddler mommy”

  1. So I’m not the only one!!!! Thanks for sharing! I stress over trying to always do a better job of being a wife and a mom but maybe I’ll just rinse the dishes and leave them every once in a while 🙂

  2. Hi Alyssa…..I know how all this feels and soon everything will calm down and there will be ‘other’ issues to handle….Just keep time open for you and Adam…..especially while he is AWAKE! Remember – laughter takes care of a lot….stress, anxiety, etc….there will be a LOT of hilarity around your house!.. Just breathe – have a plan but don’t get out of shape when it doesn’t happen….go with the flow….take care….lvjulaine

  3. Alyssa,
    I love you! Love your honesty and vulnerability. I love your parenting style and think Austin and Annie are blessed. Keep on writing.

  4. Jeff and I have laughed and laughed reading this blog. I honestly thought we were the only ones with hairy diapers, piles and piles, and ur bonus confession. I love u sister. I love u for the woman God has made u and for being honest. It takes a lot of faith. Thank you!!!

  5. You are amazingly transparent in a world where people are doing everything to look like they have it all together! I too believe you and Adam are a blessed therefore you are blessings! Your children have been placed by the Master himself…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *